Perfect...I need new pants

This is the coolest thing.....

Its everlasting bubble wrap on a keychain.

It is supposedly a game. Every 100 bubbles popped a weird noise occurs. Okay I can do with out the noise and all but they say the bubbles sound and feel like the real thing.

I'll be the judge of that. You put bubble wrap in front of me, Im in heaven. I'll pop it until it runs out or my hands start to hurt.

Im a little skeptical but I will be trying this thing out for sure.

What do you think?

Do you love bubble wrap as much as me???

Happy Halloween!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hope everyone has a great Halloweenie!!!

Looking forward to the fun pics that follow.

Guess what?????

Wait for it.............................







My car is fixed. $288.00 later the sensor that has been driving me insane has been fixed. I am sporting my car. Hooray!!!!!!!!!!!

I also changed my serpentine belt the next day.


Heres whats left:

3 new tires and 2 new rims( thaanks 55)

transmisson fluid and filter change

Drain and pressure test hoses for antifreeze, need new antifreeze.

Thats all I can think of now. I need these done before winter.

But the car is running fine and I am happy that I get to drive it again.

welcome back to hell

Whoo hoo!! driving rocks (strong sarcasm)

Here is a list of obstacles I had to deal with today driving to work: I know your jealous...

(I forgot one) I went to my car and there was frost on my windows. This is new... So I sat for 5 mins and waited for the windows to unfrost. Who knew this was the beginning of an Wonderful Adventure.

1.) 3 new stop signs on a road that is done and taken 8 months to accomplish(it was a whole 3 blocks)

2.) A Detour that I had to figure out on my own. The detour I wanted to take was stopped because the train signs were down and there was no train.

3.) Awesome detour in the middle of nowhere. Ended up at a stop sign on rt 30. It took forever to pull out.

Whew sucky but it should be smooth sailing from here, right??

4.) Got into Aurora finally, behind time but can still make that time up, but not with a cop tailing me. So 30 mph I go, weee, its like a roller coaster.

5.) Go to turn into the parking garage and an idiot tried pulling into the exit. They had to backup and go in the entrance. These people did the austin powers and backed up 4 times. wow some people do not need licenses.

6.) So I continue to follow the slow asses in front of me getting all confused and don't know where to park. AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

7.) Finally theres no one in front of me and I am going to park on the 4th floor. But its blocked. BLOCKED, you know why not. I bet I scared the living shit out of the workers because on a normal day not in the twilight zone I fly around that corner.

Fine I go around the 4th floor again park it. Finally work. So excited right. Eff no.

I clock in at 7:08 that little 8 there makes it quater after. At this point I laugh, whatever.

Then Im not here too long and my boss tells me that I didn't get my 1.75 PTO(paid time off) because it needs to be in 2 hour increments. i proceed to tell my boss Im used to getting screwed over. Fun huh.

I go to the bathroom and the cleaning lady sprayed the living shit out of the floor and toilet. I just want to pee. So I wipe the toilet down. proceed to pull the bottoms of my pants up so they don't get wet and sit down. Why is my BUTT wet!!!! Lets just say wet ring around the butt. HAHAHA really really Awesome. I am surprised my chest didn't start to hurt. Because thats been happening lately.

I ate my stinkin oat-nasty-meal and drank my water, because what i really wanted was some dunkin donuts or mcy d's.

Exhale!!! haha haha crazy laugh ha ha ha ha.

Freak out on the highway...

Imagine driving in your car going about 70 miles per hour in the middle of the day on a major highway.





You feel something possibly tickling your neck. You realize your hair is down and it may be a stray. BUT... this stray was moving a little too much.





This stray was not a stray it was this:

I knew this because I said "Dennis I think theres something on me" and by the time he looked over it moved from my neck to my boob and he hit it but he didn't want to spook me too much by hitting me hard. He saw it fall or run down my side.

I got a glipmse of the thing so I was freaking the hell out. So I made a high pitched noise and as fast as I could but as safe as I could pulled over to the side of the highway.

I got the hell out and people probably thought i was on fire. I was shaking my hair and brushing my self off, all while cars are speeding past me at lightning speed. I had Dennis look under my shirt. He was also inside the car trying to find it, with no luck.

So I wasn't going to kill myself by getting hit by a car so I got back in and luckily Dennis injured him(I found a couple of his legs on me, yum) and I found him next to my seat and killed him.

Not cool not one bit. I can't believe that thing was crawing on me let alone my bare skin. And how long was he chilling on me. eeekkk!!!

Soccer mom?????

Lindsay cracks me up......I was joking with her yesterday about sporting the minivan and she said i probably look like mom. Me and her were joking about me being a soccer mom.

Heres the deal. I have no kids and drive a little black car.

She made a sign for me...It has wildcat paws on it and a soccer in the middle with a face on it. It says SOCCER MOM. She put it on the side of the minivan.

I just happened to see it. I would of been driving around with it if I hadn't.

I was cracking up all by myself when I saw it. Too funny....

I should of known right before she left the house. She said "bye soccer mom"

Who knew grapes were so comedic...

What did the green grape say to the purple grape?

BREATHE YOU IDIOT BREATHE!!!!!!!!

heehee!!

I thought this was the cutest and funnest joke.

My boss drives me up a wall...

Seriously I was in a good mood this morning and somehow it went to shit. It not the end of the world or anything but damn I hate dealing with him when it has to do with work.

Did you know I am a fucking mind reader. i bet you didn't know that, I didn't either.

He need to step back from my desk and just do the job himself, because thats what hes gonna do anyway.

I get to deal with the whole casino trying to setup their Voicemails today. Its automated, it couldn't get any easier.

I get to record the greeting for the department again. It took me a million times to do this before. They never sounded right. I will definitely have to calm down a bit.

So my random vent was probably more for my sanity. Even though I am not feeling more sane yet. Exhale............................................

I have some really funny posts and I will try to get them out when people stop hovering around me.

SAHM's today i envy you for being your own boss. haha.

Sporting a minivan...what what!!!

Today I have my dads minivan. My car is acting up again. surprise surprise. Next week I am taking it to the dealer and just pay whatever to fix the bitch.

So driving this minivan is like driving a bus. My dad has the steering wheel set up like you would be driving a bus. I am so used to my little Hyundai Elantra this is weird.

Well I did make it to work and didn't take anyone out in the process.

The sucky part of all this is that I had to get up at the ass crack of dawn, so Dennis could pick me up and drive the 30 mins to my dads so then I could turn around and drive the hour to work. Fun!!!!

Well I indulged with some Mcy D's and I am awake and raring to go today.

Work will be fun, our vm mail server went down and they are fixing it but.... everyone in the whole casino is going to have to reset up there passwords and messages. I can't wait, can you feel the sarcasm.

So see ya later and P.S. party in my minivan later.......

Back to being off.

I am leaving for my days off. Sorry not much blogging this weeked and minimal comments. I will be keeping busy with my sister and my car. I sister is so much more important than my car of course. We are going to see a different Dr. So I will be calling them on Monday. Also driving my funny car to the shop to finally have a problem for them to see.

I'll have to make up for my missing blogs, I just got into a daily blog thing and loving comments where ever I can get them. See ya later.

Crazy Weekend....

for me my weekend lasted until yesterday.

I just got back to work and it just feels weird being here.

My weekend started with Sunday Anniversary Party for my Aunt and Uncle we also went to Starved Rock.

The next couple days revolved around my car, oh the fun was definitely had. I went a little insane briefly. I'll explain in a later post.

Then Wednesday I had am action packed day planned. I ate breakfast with Dennis. I had to take Sarah her suit coats and have lunch, run over to the eye dr and have them straighten my glasses then go to see Jacki and the kids, play with the kids, get my costume ready and help Jacki with her Stamp camp and participate also.

Well things stopped at lunch with my sister. We were having a good time just finished eating and she got a call from her Dr. She had a spider bite looking thing on her arm and they were testing it it took 5 days to get the results back. Well she has what they were testing for and we both went into shock. I spend the rest of the day with her trying to keep her occupied. She is on really heavy antibiotics and it just makes her feel like crap. We tried just joking alot. We did watch a really good movie too, "Definitely, Maybe".

I was off yesterday too. I was so drained and couldn't get to sleep. I knew I would be useless at work and had shit to do. So I did some shit and hung out with Sarah during the day and watched Greys at night.

Today I am at work and just out of it kinda. My car got the check engine light finally so I am driving Dennis's car again.

Its all good just a quick update of me.

Britney is back...

Check out the video below. Love the song. Love the video. Love the man.

Hottie for sure. This isn't the whole thing either.

I love the phrase in the song. "You call me crazy, Ive got your crazy"

It just is so me I have heard it so much on the radio already I am singing along.

Whoohoo way to go britney it was looking grim for you but somehow you brought yourself back like nothing ever happened.

Enjoy!!!

You call me crazy, Ive got your crazy

Vintage Jen-ism's.....

I was sitting on my Grandmas lap at maybe 4-5 years old. I had gotten this cool stationary notebook. Her name was Gwen(by the way just typing her name brings me to tears).

She was telling me the letters of her name . G W E N. This is how my child like brain interpreted it . I Wrote G UU E N. Double U instead of W. Get it. Everyone got a kick out of it.


Heres another one for you and this one is on video tape so I will never live it down:

I wanted a typewriter so bad as a kid. I was into teaching and secretary stuff I guess. So My mom got me one for X-mas. We would always open our gifts then start putting them together right away. My here I am in my nightgown and messy hair typing my name I got to the L and couldn't find it, the drama queen that I was at that age I freak out and say "theres NO L" You couldn't tell me different. I can here my mom saying there is an L, "NOOOO. Oh there it is" then I kept on typing.

What do you collect??

I collect three different things.

Strawberry anything. I explain it the below post all about it my obsession.

Monkeys. Not real ones silly. Anything and everything monkey. I can be picky about what the monkeys look like. I want the cute ones. Not scary ones. I also don't like monkeys that look like bears i find this alot. I also like when other people help me with my collection, then they have a story. Even at my desk I have 6 little different monkeys.

Unicorns. I have been in love with unicorns since a child. I guess I just thought they were beautiful. I had a curio cabinets full of all different sorts of unicorns. Again I get picky I dont' just want a scary horse with a horn hanging out. If you ever saw DodgeBall, I am not as bad as Christine Taylor's character.

After writing this I realized I enjoy most of collection because someone took the time and bought it for me.

What do you collect?

Sweet as strawberry pie...

Thats me of course. I am so loving my new background. I love strawberries.

I collect strawberry stuff. My kitchen was all in strawberries. When I packed everything up to move out I was surprised at how much strawberry stuff I really had. I always love to get different strawberry thing from other people too. Thats where most of my stuff comes from.

Two cool strawberry things I have gotten are vintage. Fiesty gave me a strawberry water pitcher from her late grandmother. The whole thing is a strawberry. And my sister gave me a tea cup and saucer from an antique store with strawberries on it. Love them both.

I am a redhead as most of you know. So I got a nickname from Dennis and it was strawberry.

I guess I just ran with it. Enjoy the page. "Dude its Sweet". Wheres that from fiesty???

11 things that make me crazy...

this pic made me laugh so hard. Bad hair day?? I can't stop laughing.

During lunch I came up with some fun things that get under my skin and I am sure some of yours. Let me hear your responses to these and feel free to add some that both you when you leave a comment.



1. No seating at a restaurant during lunch. Ugg. today I just walked in and walked out, I'm not sitting at the kid sized table in front of the door, No thanks.



2. IPOD Earbuds not loud enough. I am gonna blow my eardrums out. I turn up my ipod, its loud, and can still hear people talking and the music from the restaurant. They also start to physically hurt to. I just need some good old 1980's headphone. How hard would you be laughing at me.



3. Having to smell stinky ass coffee(or anything for that matter). I am sitting at lunch today and this hazelnutcraptastical smell wafts over to my nostrils. YUK. I swear she was blowing it my way. Sometimes the table next to you orders food that smells like roadkill or a foot. Gross.



4. Not being able to pass. In my older age Im not trying to pass everyone in front of me BUT the kicker is the ones who don't do the speed limit, ride the break, constantly change speeds, or and theres the lost ones.



5. Longest light on earth. These are the ones with the left turn signals. You miss that signal your screwed. This isn't your basic light, this is high traffic put your car in park your gonna be here for a while lights. And god forbid your looking down and miss the turn or it does go off. AHHHH!



6. People parking too close. This one hits home because my car looks like a little person attacked my car with one of those mini-bats. Why must you park directly next to me when there are other parking spot steps away. You'd think these people would be worried about me hitting them. I have seen and been in the car as people have hit my car with their door. Words are exchanged.



7. Waitress seating partys too close. Obviously this stems from above. You have a whole restaurant, empty, half empty. Why would you seat me on top of the other people. Why in the hell do I want to hear what they are talking about. Come on. Two tables away is enough for space. whats that again a couple extra steps. Dont give me this close, walking crap. When its busy as shit, your all over the place.



8. People that want to make conversation in bathroom stalls. Why must we speak. I am either peeing or craping I don't want to make conversation. There is nothing important enough to talk about in a stall. And when I am washing my hands and your in a stall don't talk to me and make me stay to listen to your bowel movements and waterfall pee. I want to leave, let me. I see certain people at work and get out of the bathroom fast. Note: speaking with good friend during bathroom breaks while out shopping or whatever is cool.



9. Doors that attack you. What the shit, fix the door. Why is a 500 pound door attacking me. Hate this other than it hurts like hell, you feel stupid. This goes for elevator doors too. I once was smushed in elevator doors with coffee in my hands. Nice. I guess I was invisible and the sensors couldn't see me. Today i watched a many of people be attacked bye the door at Panera.



10. Straight hair and wind. Ahh!! I have natural curly hair but when I get a bug up my ass I straighten it. Wow if theres wind there hair everywhere. Little tiny strands that you can't find attached to your face. Like walking through a spider web face first. I had my hair straight a couple of days ago and couldn't have the window even cracked, so I just put my hair up. I totally feel for anyone that deals with this everyday.



11. Guys that can't hold the door. Shivery is close to being dead. Be a gentlemen hold the effing door for a woman you prick. Especially if I am carrying something. I mean I am pretty effing independent and all but as a man you should hold the door. Unless...I am already in front of you and have my hand out to open the door. Do not cut me off or step on me to open the door this will only make me angry. Complicated I know.

Scary...when the tech is afraid to drive your car...

So I pick up my car this morning...remember with nothing fixed.

They don't want the liability of driving my car for over an hour, because I have a bad tire.

Nice another issue.

So I need at least 2 new front tires....weeeee.

All of this driving to work from Timbucktu is taking a toll on my car.

Moving on...I am happy to be driving my car again. At least for a couple days.

I so envy the girl that works behind the desk at the repair shop. She so knows stuff about cars and she is not a bitch about it.

I always wanted to take a basic car 101. I still would. I like to be well rounded, just because I have boobs doesn't mean I should be so oblivious about cars.

Do you agree? Let me know how you feel.

Vaccuums and bed spreads and cats oh my...

Yep now I vacuum my bedspread weekly. This can't be normal.

I have a comforter that is made mostly out of velvet. ha ya velvet.

Velvet and kitties get along great. So I have fur covered comforter very easily. I try so hard to keep the kitties out. One is a long hair grey domestic and the other is a calico short hair. Short or long hair just flys off these cats.

The only way to keep them out is to keep my door shut at all times this gets freaking old and I forget. They have no problem remember where to place their little kitty butts while Im gone.

Thats right, on my pillow.

So I am the weirdo that is vacuuming my bedspread. Love it.

What do you think???

I love it...never can find the magical problem

I just make these things up.

I am talking about my infamous car. It become more infamous every day.

Either way, took car to shop on bad side of town (pretty much) because they know what they are doing and work on these things every day of their life. Great.

Get this. They can get the car to have a problem. This is the story of my cars life. Exhale.

I went so out of my way to take the effing car to this shop which is inbetween work and home. I put gas in an abundance of cars to make everyone happy and be able to drive of course. .......For them to call me and tell me that THEY CAN'T RECREATE THE PROBLEM. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. CALMING DOwnnnnn.

Heres the kicker. I told them that this happens when the car has been running for awhile. I drove 70 on the highway and took 2 highways to try to create the problem. So I left it running and they went to drive it. I thought for sure it would happen. NOPE. So I asked do you want me to drive it around and bring it back. NO keep it here and we'll do diagnostic checks and whatever. Cool. right. no.

Dude, respectively tells me hes not going to guess at the problem to bring it in when its happening. GREAT. I am just going to drive up and down 80 until it effing happens. Because WHEN IT DOES HAPPEN. I may not be able to get out of 1st gear.

Can you feel my magical car problem pain here....

So I will be picking it up tomorrow morning.

I have Dennis car. He has his mothers car. I will drive his car to his house tonight. He will drive me at the ass crack of dawn to shop. He will drive home. I will drive to work.

Isnt' that what you like to do in the morning before work. Then I get to I guess drive mine or continue to drive Dennis's until my days off. Preferable Monday early.

FUN WILL BE HAD FOR ALL. Because I guess Dennis will be following me up and down 80 until it happens too. What is this a Three stooges show. Me, Dennis, and my car. huh.

ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!

Seriously....Seriously.

Just trying to come back down to earth. I am so sick of going out of my way and having stupid days off and drving other peoples cars and picking up cars and dropping off cars. Im about to blow up cars here soon.

i'll explain when I get back from lunch

Back so soon...

I don't really feel like I was off work very long. Everyday off was busy.

Heres my short breakdown

Sunday: much to my dismay I did the Birthday thing with Emily and my brother.

Our whole fam went to Applebees, then played Rock band. I'll post some pic and write up more of the details. Some is too much to take.

Monday: Had a dentist appointment Dennis took me so I didn't have to take my car(acting up).

The appointment sucked. It was uncomfortable and painful at points. They took impressions of my teeth. Those were horrible. I was choking on my own spit and then if I wasn't choking on it it was coming out the front down my face. Now most people know I I feel about saliva. Too much to take. The plastic tray was shoved into my bone under my tounge, Yess that was interesting telling her with this thing in my mouth why it hurt and she keep pushing. I did grab her at one point. Never want to do it again. Come on people my mouth is tiny ass give me what you would give a kid. So I got my extensive cleaning and found out that I have periodontal disease and will be going to the dentist about 4 times a year for the rest of my life. Thanks Mom!!

we went to walmart got the fun stuff then I had to call someone about my car. Lets just say I was a mood swinging crazy bitch. No luck on the car, so I drowned myself in Rax, yummy yummy.

By the time we got home I was reasy to just lay on the couch. I finally watched Greys and had a couple more mood swings. these I will have to explain in a different post.

Tuesday: I took my car to the shop. Me and dennis ate and I vegged out once we finally got home .

I was at the gas station 3 times and put gas in 3 cars. Too much fun I know your jealous.

I cleaned my room and did laundry that I forgot to dry. Never heard from the car repair shop no surprise.

But me and Dennis did see the new Sex and the City movie. He actually got me interested in Sex in the City. He was the perfect person to watch it with.

Some topics to come...

Is vaccumming your bed normal???

"You think Im crazy, Ive got your crazy"

How is Sunday going to turn out...I dont' wanna

Mind Numb...

AHHHH! My coffee buzz crash had totally screwed me up.

I can't think or do anything. Too many little things on my mind and I can't start a small project if my life depended on it.

All of my banking is sitting in front of me, but I can't focus.

I was checking this job out, barely focusing. Couldn't figure out how I was going to get a hold of someone I knew in the department.

I was somewhat offered a better position here and I sat on it because I want out of here and I dont' know if its too late to apply????? ARRGGGHHH

I wanted to do a bunch to my new hot blog, but can't focus.

I did call my uncle to get a number i need to help fix my car.

I am everywhere, i really wanted to listen to music my my computer is retarded. I think that would help me focus. Too bad. I am leaving work soon and I can try to focus on driving.

Damn you starbucks coffee....Damn you...

I need to step away from the blog.

Holy bejesus! I've never used that term before?

I have been effing with my blog for at least two hours. There is so much i want to add and do but its wearing my ass out.

I need to find a pic of me put on blog. Put a pic on my comments. add a blog roll, finally crawling out from under the rock, i know. Start to follow people. I want to comment on blogs I like.

But I need to do my job. Here at good old work. So I will be back later to fix her up.

SEE YA

Hot blog...whoohoo

Look how effing cute by blog is. yay I am exstaic. love love love it.



I found it at My Crazy Beautiful Life. I thought hers was the cutest blog ever and saw a link on her page.



Holy crap and it was free. It took a little extra work to change some font colors and sizes.



I never imagined it would look so cute. I have the link on my page too.

I am not even trying to win anything. I just came across it thought I would pass it on.

Bootie explanations...

At lunch yesterday I was talking to my co-workers about not working as much because we are delegated work. I commented that I don't want "secretary butt".

After all of the laughter died down of course they wanted an explanation.

Secretary bootie can happen when someone like a secretary sits on their asses at work all of the time and it grows bigger and wider. This does happen I've seen it.

Then I went a step further to explain a woman that used to work here had not only a secretary bootie but I classified hers as a "silent bootie"

Again as the roar of laughter died down, because I made a funny, I explained.

Silent bootie can be found when someone from head to waist is sitting down and look totallly proportioned. They get up and have a large ba dunk a dunk. The woman that used to work here had my body type up top and her bootie was so wide it could be seen from the front.


So that is silent bootie, it sneaks up on you.

Blog to look forward to....

tomorrow is my bootie explanations. I told my co-workers and they were crackin up.

Look for it....

Good night.

Toast to Thursday...

Thanks Jacki for giving me the special option of Toast to Thursday..



Off we go. These are the reasons I toast to Thursday...

I woke up feeling much better than yesterday.

I got some awesome sleep, new pillows.

My stress levels are much much lower and my body, im sure is thanking me

I got my correct sandwich by exchanging my burntwich from yesterday(see post)

I get paid tomorrow, whoohoo.

My boss hasn't made any stupid comment...its still early.

My engine was hungry???

I was driving today and remembered a funny story.

Has this ever happened to you???

I was checking something under the hood of my car. Who knows for what.

I noticed something green and in the shape of a leaf... It was a COOKIE.

Now this was really baffling, big time. I was in Champaign at the time and had been driving back in forth many times. I had Dennis come out and look at it. It was just sitting on the engine.

Weirdest thing ever.... So my theory was that my service guy got a sweet tooth and while he was all up in my engine he decided to have a cookie break...I wonder where he put the milk???

Thought you would get a kick out of my story.

Im Puffy????

So my boss doesn't notice I have new glasses for 2 weeks.
But he noticed that I looked Puffy today. I'm hoping he only means in the face.

Im puffy? Wow I don't know what to say.

I didn't think I looked that puffy.

HA.

What a morning...

Wow it is so funny how things just go shitty.

Its the little things really.

My drive was okay I skipped over some big traffic by taking a shortcut. made me happy.

I got into Aurora, on timeish. i stopped at Dunkin Donut to get a sandwich. I was craving one.

Then I got to work. In the matter of a half an hour things just one by one pissed me off.

My desk has been used, give me a effing break keep your nasty asses away from my desk. I'm not stupid I know someone was here. i know when things have been moved.

Then my boss says some stupid shit as usual, wasn't listening. Because I need to clean my desk before I can sit and devour my sandwich, which is calling me. Well I need something to drink. Get my diet coke and off I go to eat finally, i may not have much eye make-up on but I choose eating first.

So excited open it up and the mother effer is effing burnt. BURNT where theres no way in hell I am eating it and the smell nauseated me. This is awesome!!!! Dont you think...

So I call them up and I will be taking my sandwich to them tomorrow morning and maybe they can get it right.

Uhhhgg! So off to make oatmeal, sorry thats not a good exchange. But I am effing starving.
Well no bowl no spoon. I must of left them last week in the sink. Cross my fingers that they are there. So I make my nasty assmeal and force it down. I got Diet pop earlier because I thought I was going to gobble up my burnt-wich.

note: Diet coke and oatmeal not a good combination.

Then some crack whore called about a nonexistent problem. I love that.

So I am going to write all of this off and take a chill pill. I vented it out and I am moving on. i will just have to look forward to lunch.

Thank god for blogger and venting. i would hate to stab someone with my spoon that looked at me wrong. HHHHAAAHHHHHAAAHHHHA. Creepy laugh.

Bye.....